God in the Little things
I've said in an earlier post about how we are certain we are in the center of God's will for our lives. I feel the need to record some of the "little things" that have happened, because together they add up to some pretty "big things." Simple things like hearing a new song on the radio that links directly with adoption. Having a nurse do our physicals that adopted all three of her children. Finding out people that you know or work with have been adopted but never talk about it because they didn't think anyone would understand. It seems that the deeper we go the more we realize God is so into the details!
1. For example our class. We finished class number five tonight and are half way through our sessions. Woo Hoo!! Not that I don't love attending because I do. However it means we are one week closer to our child/children. When I first talked with our social worker about getting started with this process she was very "by the book." She gave me every correct textbook answer on the programs offered through her organization. Based on the little information she had about us she suggested a few different options. None of which is the current option we have chosen! Ha, God has humor! After discussing these options and talking with a few families who have been through this, (and reading a TON of foster to adopt blogs) we decided to go with the foster to adopt route. So I called her back, she was more than willing to let us go that route, but didn't think there would be room for us in a class until May. That was acceptable to me because, again, we were wrapping our minds around a two-four year waiting period anyway. We told her to put us on the list and send us any paperwork that we might need to complete before then. We set up a meeting to physically meet her and to get any other paper work we needed. Done deal. Or so we thought. This mind you is all over my Christmas break from school...
I would be going back to my classroom on January 7, 2013. We had a very nice size break and though I wasn't anxious to go back, I was ready to get my classroom rolling again and head straight into and over ISATs! (Anyone who works in a school knows that the months leading up to a standardized test can be grueling for everyone involved!) I was thinking how nice it would be to be finishing up my class of 5th graders and starting our foster/adoption classes. My first mistake I guess!
January 4th rolls around and our case worker called to confirm our meeting and tell us all that we needed to bring and to touch base and make sure this is what we still wanted to do. Everything was set for the next week. Monday the seventh comes and it's a crazy first day back of course. Little to my knowledge it was about to get a bit crazier. I checked my voicemail at lunch to find out that there is in fact an opening for the Foster/Adopt classes for the winter session. SWEET! I texted my husband he's in, I think this will be great! Call the agency and say sure, sign us up, when does it start? THE VERY NEXT DAY! WAHHHHHH? Again God has quite a sense of humor. However it is one more thing that led us to realize it was all a part of his plan.
2. Being in the winter session of classes and having to drive forty-five minutes to class, we were more than a little worried about the weather and the roads. But you know what, as lousy as the weather has been with ice storms, freezing rain, sleet, and of course the dreaded snow, never has it been bad on a Tuesday night. The worst we've had was a little fog. Nothing. Not even a forecast of anything slightly bad. God works in mysterious and wonderful ways.
3. We've been saying through this process that, when the Lord moves, He moves fast! We started our classes, had our first visit with a social worker, switched to a different social worker (who works with this specific program), and had our first home visit all with in three weeks of each other. Throw in finger printing, physicals, background checks, and a pile of paper work and it has been more than a little overwhelming. However, I truly believe that things are moving quickly because there is a child or a set of children who need us. Maybe they don't know they need us. Maybe no one does yet, but God knows.
4. Some of the tiniest, smallest things that happen are thoughts that pop into my head, feelings that I get in certain situations, a verse or song being said or played at just the right time. I remember sitting in our first home visit and our worker telling us to just be flexible and go with the flow and try not to plan too much because it was out of anyone's control. I remember her saying to us over, and over, and over, it's out of our control, no one knows what will happen, it's out of your control. And as I'm sitting there listening, I couldn't help but smile to myself because the whole time I kept getting these very specific thoughts ; "I'M in control, the situation isn't too big for ME, I created everything, I know everything, nothing is too big for ME. I have your very best interest in mind, I work ALL things together for your good. I AM in control."
I know that these thoughts weren't put there by my brain. The first thing my brain does in these situations is start making a list and going into panic mode over what I can do to prevent bad things from happening so I ultimately have control of all situations I am in. Not this time. I was calm, peaceful. Something very not in my nature. I am a worrier, an anxious person, one with very high anxiety. I can't help it. I blame it on my mother! Who blames it on her mother, who blames it on her mother! See where I am heading with this, it's genetically in my nature to be a "nervous nelly." However in a situation where I should be the most nervous, the most anxious about getting a child, going through the processes and having that child "return home." I thought no, I am not going down that road. I know who is in control, and if HE cares about all of these little things than surely he cares about my big things as well.
I know there will be pain, I know that we could have a placement and that that child could ultimately return home. I don't like to think about it, and it scares me even as I am typing this that that could happen. However the One that made the entire universe is guiding my future. I cling to Romans 8:28 which says that (in my paraphrase) "God makes ALL things work together for the GOOD of those who love Him." ALL things! Not just some things that look pretty and make us feel good. Not just for a few chosen people who have found favor in God's eyes. ALL things for EVERYONE who calls Him father. As I see God move in all of these "little things" I can't imagine the ways He will move in the "big things" when the time comes for all glory to be given to him!
1. For example our class. We finished class number five tonight and are half way through our sessions. Woo Hoo!! Not that I don't love attending because I do. However it means we are one week closer to our child/children. When I first talked with our social worker about getting started with this process she was very "by the book." She gave me every correct textbook answer on the programs offered through her organization. Based on the little information she had about us she suggested a few different options. None of which is the current option we have chosen! Ha, God has humor! After discussing these options and talking with a few families who have been through this, (and reading a TON of foster to adopt blogs) we decided to go with the foster to adopt route. So I called her back, she was more than willing to let us go that route, but didn't think there would be room for us in a class until May. That was acceptable to me because, again, we were wrapping our minds around a two-four year waiting period anyway. We told her to put us on the list and send us any paperwork that we might need to complete before then. We set up a meeting to physically meet her and to get any other paper work we needed. Done deal. Or so we thought. This mind you is all over my Christmas break from school...
I would be going back to my classroom on January 7, 2013. We had a very nice size break and though I wasn't anxious to go back, I was ready to get my classroom rolling again and head straight into and over ISATs! (Anyone who works in a school knows that the months leading up to a standardized test can be grueling for everyone involved!) I was thinking how nice it would be to be finishing up my class of 5th graders and starting our foster/adoption classes. My first mistake I guess!
January 4th rolls around and our case worker called to confirm our meeting and tell us all that we needed to bring and to touch base and make sure this is what we still wanted to do. Everything was set for the next week. Monday the seventh comes and it's a crazy first day back of course. Little to my knowledge it was about to get a bit crazier. I checked my voicemail at lunch to find out that there is in fact an opening for the Foster/Adopt classes for the winter session. SWEET! I texted my husband he's in, I think this will be great! Call the agency and say sure, sign us up, when does it start? THE VERY NEXT DAY! WAHHHHHH? Again God has quite a sense of humor. However it is one more thing that led us to realize it was all a part of his plan.
2. Being in the winter session of classes and having to drive forty-five minutes to class, we were more than a little worried about the weather and the roads. But you know what, as lousy as the weather has been with ice storms, freezing rain, sleet, and of course the dreaded snow, never has it been bad on a Tuesday night. The worst we've had was a little fog. Nothing. Not even a forecast of anything slightly bad. God works in mysterious and wonderful ways.
3. We've been saying through this process that, when the Lord moves, He moves fast! We started our classes, had our first visit with a social worker, switched to a different social worker (who works with this specific program), and had our first home visit all with in three weeks of each other. Throw in finger printing, physicals, background checks, and a pile of paper work and it has been more than a little overwhelming. However, I truly believe that things are moving quickly because there is a child or a set of children who need us. Maybe they don't know they need us. Maybe no one does yet, but God knows.
4. Some of the tiniest, smallest things that happen are thoughts that pop into my head, feelings that I get in certain situations, a verse or song being said or played at just the right time. I remember sitting in our first home visit and our worker telling us to just be flexible and go with the flow and try not to plan too much because it was out of anyone's control. I remember her saying to us over, and over, and over, it's out of our control, no one knows what will happen, it's out of your control. And as I'm sitting there listening, I couldn't help but smile to myself because the whole time I kept getting these very specific thoughts ; "I'M in control, the situation isn't too big for ME, I created everything, I know everything, nothing is too big for ME. I have your very best interest in mind, I work ALL things together for your good. I AM in control."
I know that these thoughts weren't put there by my brain. The first thing my brain does in these situations is start making a list and going into panic mode over what I can do to prevent bad things from happening so I ultimately have control of all situations I am in. Not this time. I was calm, peaceful. Something very not in my nature. I am a worrier, an anxious person, one with very high anxiety. I can't help it. I blame it on my mother! Who blames it on her mother, who blames it on her mother! See where I am heading with this, it's genetically in my nature to be a "nervous nelly." However in a situation where I should be the most nervous, the most anxious about getting a child, going through the processes and having that child "return home." I thought no, I am not going down that road. I know who is in control, and if HE cares about all of these little things than surely he cares about my big things as well.
I know there will be pain, I know that we could have a placement and that that child could ultimately return home. I don't like to think about it, and it scares me even as I am typing this that that could happen. However the One that made the entire universe is guiding my future. I cling to Romans 8:28 which says that (in my paraphrase) "God makes ALL things work together for the GOOD of those who love Him." ALL things! Not just some things that look pretty and make us feel good. Not just for a few chosen people who have found favor in God's eyes. ALL things for EVERYONE who calls Him father. As I see God move in all of these "little things" I can't imagine the ways He will move in the "big things" when the time comes for all glory to be given to him!
Comments
Post a Comment